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desperate measures

desperate measures

Thu, 05/07/2009 - 01:32 by Conrad in response to desperate times

This was certainly not one of my finer moments. Fearing for the safety of the plastic pipes in our old apartment, I simply started disposing of the grease out the second-story window, which left a pleasant little pattern in the snow below. Little did I know, of course, that all the grease was actually sinking below the snow until around March when the snow melted. You could see a grease stain in the concrete below that must have measured a half-meter in diameter. No lie, it was kind of gross. 

Of course, now I'm much more mature and store it in a glass booze bottle, kept proudly on the back stoop. When the sun hits it it melts, turning a fine shade of amber. It's like a gross meat thermometer.

Yuko and Ananth are back on Tuesday, ending my terrible reign. Oh, thank you all for the overwhelming response to the contest! Seriously, it's great to see so many people getting milage out of it. :D


Little greasy here

Comment by A.L. (not verified) Thu, 05/07/2009 - 02:19

I use to do the same thing,either the grease went down the drain or I would find a nice spot outside to chunk it all.After we moved,I quickly found out that doesn't fly when your pipes are plastic and very loose and I didn't feel like killing the ground where I was pouring grease again.Now I just bag it and chuck it in the garbage can outside.

Also first comment! Booyah!

Another thing

Comment by A.L. (not verified) Thu, 05/07/2009 - 02:21

I would also like to mention I'm going to miss your reign of terror,it was most enjoyable.Maybe Yuko and Ananth will let you take over more often while they're gone :D.

He knew what must be done. And he would do it.

Comment by Anonymous (not verified) Thu, 05/07/2009 - 02:54

Yay for gross meat thermometers.

Also, it's not 'conrad did something dumb again' if everyone lets you for an entire year. :P

My Wife Stores Grease in Bottles as Well

Comment by McClaud (not verified) Thu, 05/07/2009 - 03:26

It's not that our pipes can't take it, but that she's Puerto Rican. She grew up being taught that you can't dump grease down the drain because most of the houses had plastic plumbing. That and not to be wasteful and re-use the grease when cooking. So out of habit, I find her pouring grease into old bottles around the kitchen.

I mix grease with a compound that has vinegar in it that breaks up the oil from grease and makes it safe for pouring it down the sink (ours is metal but I don't want to clog the sewer lines farther down). I end up throwing her bottles of grease in the trash to be picked up after putting some baking soda in it.

Either way, we get rid of it now, instead of having it build up in bottles around the house. But I do agree that it is a weird type of amber-colored thermometer. lolz

me too.

Comment by sighjay (not verified) Thu, 05/07/2009 - 05:09

i keep mine in a glass peanut butter jar. after it melts and re-co-mingles it has a brownish color that is just close enough to peanut butter for me to pray that someone will make a grease and jelly sandwich and i can watch the reaction.

Dude! You should KEEP your

Comment by Caitlin (not verified) Thu, 05/07/2009 - 07:38

Dude! You should KEEP your bacon fat. Use it to make soap or cook potatoes or fry burgers in... tasty piggy!

Animal fats make good soap

Comment by Nibbles (not verified) Thu, 05/07/2009 - 08:17

Animal fats make good soap (just add lye!) when they're fresh (smell funny otherwise). And Canola/Peanut oils can be filtered and put in diesel engines to run on.

What would Macgiver do?

Comment by Mike (not verified) Thu, 05/07/2009 - 08:41

Strain it maybe cheese cloth if you got it. Put in a dish with a wick and ta da candle. It will smell of what you cooked. More realistically bottle it, freeze it, trash it.

John and I actually did

Comment by conrad Thu, 05/07/2009 - 08:50

John and I actually did this. We put all the bacon fat in a small bit of tin foil with a piece of string in it while it congealed. We then lit the wick and watched our terrible bacon candle burn. John reports it didn't smell as good as you might expect. I have no comment. ;)

That even predates

Comment by Ananth Thu, 05/07/2009 - 09:01

That even predates Spacklehaus!

Your kitchen was on the

Comment by Cheri (not verified) Thu, 05/07/2009 - 09:40

Your kitchen was on the second floor?


Well, the second floor was

Comment by Rachelle (not verified) Thu, 05/07/2009 - 12:05

Well, the second floor was technically the first for us. Other people lived on the bottom while we had the second and third floors. Results 1 - 10

Comment by Greg (not verified) Thu, 05/07/2009 - 09:41 Results 1 - 10 of about 14,900 for how to dispose of cooking grease. (0.19 seconds)

there was that hard? Personally I just take a piece of paper toweling, wipe the surface of the pan then toss the paper in the garbage.

Grease on the lawn

Comment by Jeff (not verified) Thu, 05/07/2009 - 15:17

Well, if what Alton Brown and good eats are to be believed (which I think they are) he says you can just dump the stuff on your lawn since it'll biodegrade.

you dont save it?

Comment by Darren (not verified) Thu, 05/07/2009 - 19:47

its good on toast or for making eggs or pancakes or anthing else that goes good with bacon..

bacon grease should be re-used..soooo tasty

I just love the tags on this

Comment by Ed (not verified) Thu, 05/07/2009 - 22:26

I just love the tags on this one haha.

Hurray! More Spacklehaus!

Comment by Mentaluproar (not verified) Fri, 05/08/2009 - 01:34

I'm so glad to see spacklehaus return!

As for disposing of grease, I have always poured it into a paper cup and tossed that in the fridge. The cold turns it into a burger king/candle wax hybrid material. The next time I empty the garbage, I toss in the solidified grease, cup and all.

we do that in my house as

Comment by Anonymous (not verified) Sat, 05/09/2009 - 01:26

we do that in my house as well. but of course, the oil is reused a max of three times.

oh yeah, i just got my phoenix down shirt! my aunt bought it for me and sent it here! thanks guys! it looks awesome and spiffy!

extra grease?

Comment by Daitengu (not verified) Sat, 05/09/2009 - 04:18

I personally hardly ever have extra grease from the bacon I cook. I usually cook a whole pack because I cook for 3. I dice up 3 to 5 potatoes, and throw them on. I love me some homemade hashbrowns. (Southern style to most people).

The potatoes suck up so much grease that by the time I get done making a good half dozen eggs my pan is clean of most all the grease.

Potatoes made in this way are still great cold versus baking or using vegetable oil. But that's just my opinion.


Comment by Rachelle (not verified) Sat, 05/09/2009 - 16:59

OH MY GOD THAT SOUNDS DELICIOUS! I'll have to try that...or rather get Conrad to make me some potato bacons. I love any combination of potato, bacon, and cheese <3

It takes a good 30 to 45

Comment by Daitengu (not verified) Mon, 05/11/2009 - 05:11

It takes a good 30 to 45 minutes in the pan for the potatoes to get good and crunchy(mmm, crunchy), but you could eat it anywhere from 20 minutes onward. on medium high heat.

remember to mix the potatoes ever 2 to 3 minutes after about 10 minutes from initially putting the potatoes in the pan.

It takes a while to cook, but the reward is just so good.

Since the potatoes are cooked right after the bacon, I don't have to worry about anything getting cold.

Haha... This reminds me of a

Comment by Angela (not verified) Sun, 05/10/2009 - 01:05

Haha... This reminds me of a sort-of related story. Way back in high school my best friend and I had to deep fry some mozzarella sticks for cooking class, and since neither of us knew how to properly dispose of the oil, and we were too scared to ask the scary teacher, we left in the deep fryer for the rest of the year. We have no idea to this day who got to clean it out.

If only we'd thought to just dump it out the window... Oh well. *shrugs*

it's awful

Comment by Deep Fryer (not verified) Tue, 01/05/2010 - 02:15

It's awful to hear that but can understand that teachers sometimes are shit's if they are not friendly.Angela it's not that you can't fry mozzarella sticks. you should make a try to that instead of leaving deep fryer for the year.

IT's all a CROCK

Comment by Inujo (not verified) Sun, 05/10/2009 - 06:36

Come on people! "aged" grease is the best seasoning out there! Crock it. Buy a large crock pot as in an old flour or sugar container..the older the better..pour your left over greese in it and reuse it over and over.

One/two Tablespoons added as seasoning to any vegetable dish is like a ancient secret. IF it's unhealthy I'd like to add right now that my family is full of ancient folks!

Some people separate it according to what was cooked in it. i.e. Chicken or Pork onion or not onion it's a taste thing.

Do NOT reuse Beef grease. You can put it in a plastic container when it cools and add bird seed to it..birds love it.

Do Not fry raw Chicken in old grease I don't know if it loses something in the reheating but it doesn't fry up as well. My Mother mixes new oil with old oil to fry chicken up.


Comment by yuki-chanthecrazycat (not verified) Sun, 05/10/2009 - 18:47

i love conrad's's so determined

I use to do the same thing

Comment by Snowblind (not verified) Mon, 05/18/2009 - 05:34

I use to do the same thing

oh my god. i've been on the

Comment by tzxazrael (not verified) Fri, 05/22/2009 - 06:27

oh my god.

i've been on the internet for a long time, and i've seen a lot of things.. and even the famous gross-out sites on the net of a little ways back only earned a mild "ew.. *close*"..

"It's like a gross meat thermometer."

congratulations, i was truly revolted! (probably because i have one of those in my kitchen too)
and yet... i couldn't stop laughing either. XD

for my 2c.. large glass jars (spaghetti sauce and whatnot) make excellent containers. plus they come with a good lid! just let it cool, lid, and trash!

ps; sighjay, your (not)PB&J sandwich proves that you are a cruel, horrible person. keep up the good show.

I do the same

Comment by Trypno (not verified) Sat, 08/08/2009 - 16:16

Storing grease in a glass liquor bottle. Mine was a Highland Mist bottle.


Comment by Hyle (not verified) Fri, 01/08/2010 - 11:27

You guys threw out bacon grease? The horror! The most delicious( aka bad for you) food is made best with bacon grease. It's long been a tradition in my family that if you cook bacon, you pour the grease into a grease pot (usually a small ceramic pot though I've seen metal ones and some with built in strainers). Best cornbread I ever make is when I grease the pan with the stuff. I tried cooking spray and that is not as good.

You know you're supposed to

Comment by Sumar (not verified) Tue, 04/27/2010 - 22:15

You know you're supposed to mix grease with soap and water to break it down, then dump it in the toilet?

I think you can flavor stuff

Comment by Elkian (not verified) Mon, 06/28/2010 - 20:26

I think you can flavor stuff with bacon grease. Maybe you should try reusing it?

I think you can flavor stuff

Comment by Elkian (not verified) Mon, 06/28/2010 - 20:26

I think you can flavor stuff with bacon grease. Maybe you should try reusing it?


Comment by Anonymous (not verified) Mon, 02/11/2013 - 21:53

I have a recipe at home for crispy bacon…and it’s really easy, and the best part is, the cleanup is really, really easy…preheat the oven for 400 F, then get a baking sheet ready, place parchment paper on top (that’s what I use). When the oven is ready put the bacon on the parchment, the bacon has to be at least an inch apart…(if you don’t do this, it won’t be crispy…trust me) put the bacon in for 15 minutes…and it’s done! As for cleanup, throw away the parchment paper.